5 days and counting

Can you beleive it is only 5 days now until I hit the stage!!

Am i nervous???? well, naturally yes! I am worried i will look out of place, that i won't be able to walk in my heels, that i will forget my routine, that I will forget to suck my tummy in really tight!!! so many fears!

I think ultimately it comes down to the fact that in my head i am still an "insecure fat chick" and have not come to terms with my new body yet. I think this experience on stage will be a chapter of my life closing and a new book being opened, finaly i will be able to put my insecurities behind me and work on being who i now am, a more confident person, happy within her own body.

Once i get this weekend over with, it will be rest time for us, with a well deserved break for the whole family, it will be time for us to reconnect with each other and share food together. All of us have made sacrifices for this competition, my family have had to put up with alot of tiredness/grumpyness/low carbness (is that a word???)and i am truely thakfull for all their support and encouragement.

The plan will be to get back into training when we get home and build on the base i now have. I need more muscle, so the diet will be changing so i can train and eat to build instead of reduce!! it will be interesting being able to train with food in my system again, i should be able to hit some all time personnal bests once i have some good energy back in the system.

So, what is left for this week. Today is day 2 of carb depleting, only green veggies with my protein for me at the moment. Water is on about 4L so that is very do-able (actually i am struggling to stop at 4, but it ups to 6L tomorrow!!) Wednesday and Thursday are water loading days, thursday and friday i get to reintroduce sweet potato into the day (yeah!!!!!) so plenty of things happening this week to get me looking the best i can possibly be on saturday!!

Oh yeah, i forgot, bikini still isn't quite right, i pick it up on thursday, hopefully by the it will be perfect!!!!